Getting along is important because other people are important

Having other people on our side, people who know and respect and trust us, is widely recognized as a huge advantage in our lives. Connections, networking, and a variety of other terms all refer to this important yet surprisingly difficult aspect of our existence. Even though most of us are around people for most of our lives, forming these connections does not happen automatically or easily. Many of our interactions with others are specialized and transitory in nature, so they don’t lend themselves to the kind of ongoing connection that can become long-lasting and valuable relationships.

We all know they can be annoying — or worse — at times. However, if you ever begin to wonder if you wouldn’t be better off without other people, here is a quick thought exercise to consider.

What if you were really all alone?

Think about this: Imagine that anything and everything around you — including the clothes you are wearing, the furniture you are using, and the computer or phone on which you’re reading this — just disappears. The only man-made items remaining in your environment are those that you have created yourself completely from scratch.

With extremely few exceptions, this will leave you hungry, naked, and either shivering or sweating depending on the season. Your chances of survival in this state will be extremely low.

Disasters

And speaking of survival, this leads to another stark reminder of just how important we are to each other. Think of a desperate survival situation, perhaps following a natural disaster or simply due to an error in judgment.

A family on a road trip gets stuck in a snowdrift. A hiker in the Grand Canyon sprains an ankle and can’t go on. Or a shipwreck leaves desperate souls lost at sea.

What is, without a doubt, the one thing that all these would-be survivors are hoping to encounter? We know the answer. Other people! In a life-threatening situation, civilization in the form of other humans can literally make the difference between life and death.

Getting along versus world peace

We joke about “world peace,” but deep down we all know it is no laughing matter. After thousands of years of war and endless conflict, it is easy to understand why the thought of a peaceful world seems hopeless. And yet, when you strip away the excess verbiage, it all comes down to the inability to just get along with each other.

The part you can control: getting along with others in your life

World peace, unlikely as it may be, would be great. Unless you are one of the tiny number of people driving international politics, however, there isn’t anything you or I can do about it.

So, let’s take a look at how improving our ability to get along with others can make a difference in our personal lives. In case you are wondering, this will definitely include those “others” who don’t seem to be making much of an effort to get along with you.

Can “getting along” help with money problems?

Financial struggles are likely the biggest source of stress and concern for many individuals and families. I would be in the history books if I could offer a direct fix for this problem by learning to get along better. Unfortunately, financial stress can make it even more difficult for people to get along.

The good news is there can be a significant boost to figuring out and dealing with financial problems when we take the time to improve our interactions with others. Here are some examples.

Getting along can make work less of a pain

Let’s not mince words: for all too many people, work sucks. Maybe that is a bit harsh, but studies continue to show that major portions of the workforce find their work unsatisfying at best. The obvious result is a vast number of unhappy workers. This is bad enough, but all too many make matters worse by taking their unhappiness out on each other.

A good start: getting along at work

There is definitely a “real world” benefit to maintaining good and positive interactions with your coworkers. Two of the most frequently mentioned attributes employers would like to see improved among new hires are communication and the ability to work well with others.

Genuinely getting along at work is a good start. If you are willing to combine this with the 1-2 punch of doing an excellent job and recognizing the value you are providing to your organization, you will have a good chance at succeeding.

For an example of this principle at work in a corporate environment, see my article Treat Me Wrong, Treat Me Right: Who Decides?

Being your own boss. Getting along with others is still important.

For many, the age-old antidote for the madness of working for others consists of starting your own business and, yes, being your own boss. With a lot of hard work and perhaps a little luck, this can result in a more rational and even enjoyable working environment.

One thing that is probably not going to change, however, is the need to deal with others fairly and rationally. That is to say, to get along. In fact, it will likely be even more important than when you were working for someone else.

The never-ending problems in many workplaces have resulted in vast amounts of legislation regarding the employee-employer relationship. Even an extremely difficult employee — one whose mission seems to be to not get along — can be difficult to terminate due to this legislation.

For a small business owner, it’s a completely different ball game.

A hard-won customer, possibly one of the big spenders keeping your business going, does not have to fill in a form or consult a bureaucrat in order to leave you for the competition. Treating your customers fairly (and making sure your employees, if any, do the same) can quite literally make the difference between success and failure when you are on your own.

Partners are important too

It’s essential to get along with your business partners. Think of the high-profile entertainment acts that have ceased to exist because the parties involved couldn’t figure out how to get along with each other. The money spent on legal fees could be put to far better use building the business.

Getting along with family members

I don’t think anyone would deny that family issues can be some of the most complicated and tricky of all to unravel. Rather than tackle such a massive topic in its entirety, I will limit this discussion to getting along with family as it relates primarily to financial issues.

Communication can help when times are tough

Communication, as I will discuss in the next section, is essential for getting along. With more and more families struggling with financial issues, it would be helpful if the tension and friction among the family members could be minimized. Whichever family member or members are doing their best to improve the situation already have enough on their plate. It can help greatly if the rest of the family can fully understand the situation and be as supportive as possible.

Clear and honest communication about the realities involved can frequently go a long way toward maximizing harmony, or at least reducing excess negativity, during what is already a difficult and stressful time.

The family business: success and prosperity — or crash and burn?

This is a highly charged topic for me, as I have experienced firsthand what happens when highly talented family members allow their troubled relationship to wreck what might otherwise have been a highly successful business. The resulting disappointment and emotional devastation, I suspect, laid the foundation for my long-term interest in dealing with what I consider “unnecessary and fixable” problems. Ultimately, this interest has led me to become the Freedom Preacher.

Dealing fairly and rationally with others — getting along — is far better than the alternatives, regardless of the context. In a business environment, treating your partners, employees, vendors, and customers well is essential, whether they are family members or not. However, being in business with family does present additional challenges.

The old saying about picking your friends but not your family provides a clue to one of the difficulties. Rather than hiring the best person for a position, it can be tempting to “force fit” a family member into the position. This can not only provide poor results, it can also lead to lower morale on the part of other employees.

Wrapping up

This article has covered some of the benefits to humanity that will result if we can learn to truly and consistently get along with each other. I have focused on areas in which we as individuals can make improvements in our interactions with others. But a quick look at the headlines will do the best job of illustrating how crucial this topic really is. If we don’t make some big improvements  —  and soon — we just might wind up in a worldwide catastrophe.

If you enjoyed this article, you might want to check out Part 2 in the “getting along” series in which I explain some of the reasons why we don’t get along. After that, the really good news is in Part 3: How the Freedom Preacher can help us to get along better.